A treat that needs a repeat

By Ramesh BijlaniSpiritual retreats are in high demand, and supply is keeping pace. Beyond being trendy, the demand comes from the hectic pace and conflicted state of mind that characterise modern life. Getting away from it all for a week is tempting, and when you sign up for the retreat, you mercifully forget to ask, ‘what after the week is over?’ The retreat is a package deal.A day packed with yoga classes, meditation, music, motivational talks, and long treks in scenic surroundings seems like such a relief from our lives. Along with this enchanting routine comes a comfortable stay and healthy food.We spend a week in a dream world. A perfect routine, new friends, positive affirmations. Towards the end of the retreat, you become so addicted to the new routine that you feel apprehensive about returning to the life the retreat offered an escape from. But we have to return; we know that, too.We return, thrive on sweet memories from the retreat, and try to apply what we learnt there to life, but soon we give up. Are the forces that run our lives too strong, or is our willpower too weak? We do not know. But there is always another retreat to go to when we just can’t stand it anymore.Is something wrong with us that keeps us going from one retreat to another? If we look at our expectationsfrom a retreat, they generallyare: stress relief, good health,happiness, mental peace, andoccasionally enlightenment; and we expect to learn at the retreat how to get all that we want. If we look at these expectations closely, they are all focused on ‘myself’. What i forget is that true joy, lasting mental peace and a sense of fulfilment never come from getting what i want.All that i want is always a by-product of giving; the type of giving which is an expression of love. Love, rooted in connection with the loved one, is a basic human need. It is also a spiritual need because we are all connected by belonging to the same Creator’s family. Nobody has ever attained a state of perpetual joy and peace without shifting the focus from oneself to others.Why don’t retreats tell us that? Many do, but they don’t say it bluntly. Till we put into practice the new attitude to life that a retreat might tell us only in subdued tones, the retreat works like a drink. But immersion in a retreat is certainly a much better and safer experience than drowning in alcohol. However, until we shift from ‘me to we’, temporary relief is just a retreat away.A retreat is, literally, a safe, secure place far removed from difficulties and dangers. It offers an attractive shield from a punishing routine, masking our problems by filling the day with uninterrupted rejuvenation of the body and mind, where the soul also makes a few uplifting guest appearances.Retreats mask our problems but do not solve them. Hence, we keep repeating retreats until we discover the safe, secure, and sacred sanctuary within, to which we can retreat anytime, wherever we happen to be.Disclaimer: Views expressed above are the author's own.